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18 January, 2006

The mischievous midriff

Could this be Dubai's latest ploy to increase the dire status of its celebrity population, after handing out free villas to overpaid British ball-kickers failed to lure the A-list? Let's not wait for them to come, let's forcibly extradite them instead! As a starter, some Lebanese pop starlet has been summoned to court over a music video which allegedly shows her "baring her midriff and dancing suggestively":

"According to [lawyer Eisa Bin Haider], the music video showed the singer, who plays a teenaged schoolgirl, wearing a miniskirt. She sings and dances in 'an inappropriate and seductive manner' before her male schoolteacher."

What a fantastic way to get international music luminaries into the sandlands! With their saucy lyrics, hotpants, booty-jiggling and grinding, there's hardly a singer out there who wouldn't be eligible for some mandatory Dubai hospitality. Once the new Dubai Zoo is built (they've only been promising it for about fifteen years, so it surely can't be more than another decade away?) they can renovate the old zoo, and turn it into a special Prison for the Stars to house "indecent and seductive" celebrities.

It would be a superb tourism attraction. Instead of the fetid reek of giraffe dung roasting in the sun, the lovely aroma of celebrity signature-perfumes would waft through leafy Jumeirah each afternoon. And the A-listers would surely be cheaper to feed than the big cats and brown bears currently wolfing down kilos of prime steak: a few lettuce leaves and bottles of Masafi should suffice.

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16 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry, you've lost me here. Was this video made in Dubai or just broadcast there? If this Lebanese singer's video was made in, say, Lebanon, I can't think why a court in Dubai would imagine it had any jurisdiction except, possibly, over the broadcaster.

Perhaps this is why the Department of Public Prosecution originally told Eisa Bin Haider to get stuffed.

18 January, 2006 05:49  
Blogger Parv said...

I take it these boys didn't make it to the Destiny's child concert at DUBAI Media City laste year. One look at Beyonce's jiggling booty in a sequinned petticoat would be enough to abandon all "social and cultural values".

Hypocricy at its finest.

18 January, 2006 08:06  
Blogger samuraisam said...

one sentence i don't understand;
Lt Gen Dahi had allocated Dh500,000, which he will pay, to sue indecent TV channels.

is he paying out of his own pocket for this?

18 January, 2006 09:04  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Eisa Bin Haider NEEDS MONEY. Is it that difficult to fathom?

18 January, 2006 09:08  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Since moving to the UAE, I have begun to blurt out "Get a brain!" indisciminately, on a more and more regular basis. No doubt I will lose my own brain here and be left in a vegetative state, just blurting out those three words. This place is no good for intellectual growth because you are constantly fighting the petty bullshit of these types of Philistine with no brain and too much power. That, coupled with the non stop disbelief, leave not much time for anything else. It appears that Homer Simpson's "DOH" was toiler made for the things that happen here

18 January, 2006 09:31  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What a steaming load of horse bile this is! Like miniskirts and midriffs are unheard of in Dubai!!!

They didn't mention who the Lebanese singer was, but I have a few guesses.

18 January, 2006 10:23  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

no mention of the name of the singer??

could it be 'gasp'....Shakira??

( she is of lebanese descent ya know )
;)

18 January, 2006 10:57  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

it is miriam fares, i have heard

18 January, 2006 11:27  
Blogger archer14 said...

Yeah...it'd be a fantastic place to house celebs...Imagine if Dubai Zoo were to be made into Dubai Neverland...with none other than whacko Jacko as the star attraction (free entry for kids, mind you). And with specials hosted by world famous celebs such as Chuck Norris (Roundhouse kicks in Neverland), Jhonny Depp (I've found Neverland), Steven Segal & Don Johnson (Jackos Wooden Art Exhibition) and William Shatner (Denny Crane in Neverland....Denny....CRANE)

18 January, 2006 12:37  
Blogger moryarti said...

"According to him, the music video showed the singer, who plays a teenaged schoolgirl, wearing a miniskirt. She sings and dances in 'an inappropriate and seductive manner' before her male schoolteacher."

unmistakably Maria

18 January, 2006 13:13  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

dubai! really NOT what u think it is!

18 January, 2006 20:40  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

of course i think it's silly the ppl behind this video are being taken to court.

you really have to see the video for yourself though. its hilarious, and it is quite suggestive. the schoolgirls are shown sucking on lollipops in front of their teacher to seduce him, and bending over in their short skirts to pick up dropped pencils. at the end the old ugly headmistress sees the teacher flirting with the students and becomes jealous (coz she also has a crush on the teacher)... so she gives him a spanking!!

crazy!

19 January, 2006 02:07  
Blogger secretdubai said...

you really have to see the video for yourself though

OK now I have read your description I would love to see it! It sounds like my ultimate schooldays fantasy about my history teacher ;)

19 January, 2006 06:50  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

suppose the shoe was on the other foot.... a male student fantasising about his female teacher... would he have been called to court too ? for err... wearing shorts or bending down to pick a pencil?

just a thought...( maybe i've got too much time on my hands ) :)

19 January, 2006 12:39  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"for err... wearing shorts or bending down to pick a pencil"

yeah, he should be taken to court - for being gross

19 January, 2006 12:50  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have seen this video (unfortunately!) and it really is retarded! You could probably see better acting in a porno...

There is this one Egyptian singer Ruby... uff man she is really hot! I had only heard her songs and I used to love her vocals, but when i saw her video i realized she is a damn good belly dancer as well! WOMEN....!!!

19 January, 2006 16:45  

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