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17 October, 2005

The Barber and the Beautiful

What need to import soap operas when fascinatingly sordid drama is available right here right now? In this instance, a Filipino barber and his 21-year-old girlfriend, a housemaid, are being deported for an "illegitimate love affair". A crime that reminds us all that however nightclub-ridden and westernised the sandlands may appear, this is still very much a muslim country:

"In his statement to the police, the 23-year-old denied having an illicit affair. Meanwhile, the Filipina confessed that she was having a love affair with the barber.

"She alleged that she was having a similar affair with her sponsor.

"The Canadian sponsor denied her claims but his wife said she had suspected that something was going on between her housemaid and her husband."

Frankly, any westerner that calls the police to have someone prosecuted for something that is legal in their home country is loathesome and most probably a hypocrite. If one feels compelled to act/not tolerate a situation that is illegal here, the most humane thing to do is to dismiss the person, and firmly tell any third parties to make themselves scarce.

Such as the kind Jumeira Jane whose young maid got pregnant by a neighbouring houseboy, and miscarried. Her sponsor took her to a private hospital, where she wouldn't face too many questions, and then arranged a flight back to Bangladesh, where the young woman could receive appropriate medical treatment without fear of prosecution.

But we all know what happened here. Mr Canadian acted out of pure spite when he found his free bit of skirt schlepping someone younger and more attractive. Hopefully his poor wife will make full use of her home country's westernised laws to screw him for every last penny in alimony.

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Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Secret

hmmm.. a ménage à trois gone awry in the sandpit.... as you rightly put it the issue is not just of the hypocrisy of the deportation (from the otherwise desert of lust), but of the Westerner who behaved like a typical male chauvanist piggy scorned and dejected.... just goes to show that chauvanism and bigotry cut across cultures and int'l boundaries - Mrs. Canadian: relegate him to the depths of the tundra....

sleepy S&L ... zzzz

17 October, 2005 04:23  
Blogger YelJay said...

you beat me to it SD.

When I have read the same article myself, I am appalled with the hypocritic reaction of Mr. Canadian (-I really hate using his nationality to describe him!). I would really have to say that he is sharing the s#ag with the poor girl as you exactly put it.

I don't think premarital s*x or adultery is the issue here and neither would I advise fellow kabayans to go out and become promiscuous as they wannabe as well.

17 October, 2005 08:52  
Blogger Tim Newman said...

I guess the concept of consenting adults has yet to earn the protection of Emirati law?

As for the Canadian, I hope his wife takes him to the cleaners.

17 October, 2005 09:01  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

As a Canadian, I hate that this guy is giving Canadians a bad name!

17 October, 2005 09:13  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry to change the subject, SD, but did you notice that have closed their chatboard "for review"? There have been a few minor catfights on there recently, which were quickly deleted by the moderators, but nothing offensive (as far as I know). This is a particularly useful site for families moving to the UAE and a major support for all the "desperate housewives" out there. As someone who is obviously well informed about local scuttlebutt - do you know what's going on?

17 October, 2005 09:15  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

People, People.. let us remind ourselves.. it was an 'alleged' relationship between the employer and the maid, the key word here being 'alleged'. Secondly although a canadian citizen, canada is a land of immigrants and we never know how late an immigrant this particular gentleman was or what his origin is ( i have a pretty good idea, but i'll keep that to meself). And maybe his missus is using this as an excuse to 'take him to cleaners' because she wanted to 'get out'....

we'll never know the full story..will we?

and by the way, i'm not canadian, not by a long shot ! :)

17 October, 2005 11:17  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

There's catfights at expatmums? What the hell do they argue about? Which brand of diapers are better? Who's baby doctor charges the most? The mind boggles.

P.S. I am not Canadian either. (Just thought that important bit of info should be put out there.)

17 October, 2005 12:22  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

probably whose plumber does a better 'job'


17 October, 2005 12:24  
Blogger One Nine Seven One said...

someone already mentioned this indirectly but the canadian may not be a white westerner but could be arab or muslim.

17 October, 2005 12:55  
Blogger samuraisam said...

why would the canadian get pissed off if he wasnt in a relationship with the maid?

"The Dubai public prosecution charged the barber with trespassing into a private property and having an illegitimate love affair with the housemaid."

then how come the canadian has not been arrested seeing as he was also having sexual relations out of marriage?

"She alleged that she was having a similar affair with her sponsor.

The Canadian sponsor denied her claims but his wife said she had suspected that something was going on between her housemaid and her husband. "

it's seems quite apparant the he was playing "hide the sausage" with the housemaid, also he was having an affair because he was married already.
if they can arrest philipino's then how can they not arrest the canadian?

If they decide to arrest one they should fairly be arresting them all.

17 October, 2005 13:13  
Blogger black feline said...

its not unusual really...for maids(from philippines and indonesia..well documented) to have multiple's not just the loneliness, sexual thing..these lovely sistas are very enterprising too..imagine, she can collect 100dhm each time from ali, mustapha, suntze, jack and john..why not? its a fair deal..BUT it can be deadly too! recently, 2 months ago , one filippino maid was killed and hacked to many pieces by another fellow maid in singapore over a taxi driver. The ghastly parts were discovered all over the city. Ironically, both maids are married.
I think it's also in the pinoy colleague has 5 kids from 3 different ladies...
Trespassing is a crime...having an affair is not..unless that maid cried RAPE!!!!!!!!!....For every lecherous employer..there is also a desperate do anything for kindly refrain from any misplaced compassion!

17 October, 2005 14:02  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The question is less the Canadian's behavior - which, as you point out, is excerable - but the bizarre laws in question. In most parts of the world, states have decided that the behavior of consenting adults - and their consequences - should be worked out among the affected parties, rather than being matters belonging to the state.

The rationale given that the state is protecting the "fabric of society." That, however, is especially thin given the persons involved. Is Emirati society defined by guest workers separated for years, even decades, from their loved ones? Clearly not, as they're entirely disconnected from any ability to influence the democratic process. Why, then, does the state here regulate the behavior of people, among each other, who are not, by definition, members of its society?

17 October, 2005 14:04  
Blogger _sublime_ said...

The whole jail for sexoring thing sucks on principle but in this case the backwardness of Dubai is rather sweet and poetic in tis twistedness long as the husband gets his fair share of the medecine.

Whatta twat, getting all twisted up in bangoring the maid. Obviously from the eastern side of canada ;D

17 October, 2005 15:12  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i see black feline is still as dumb as ever....hahaha..keep up the yap crap yap. At least u make my day...

17 October, 2005 15:43  
Blogger _sublime_ said...

um actually black feline has a point, homewrecking/philandering maids are not unheard of but it really is hard to judge when things go all pear shaped.

17 October, 2005 15:59  
Blogger secretdubai said... update here for those interested.

17 October, 2005 16:02  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

nomaadic said... "the canadian may not be a white westerner but could be arab or muslim".
17 October, 2005 12:55

Jesus! For a change the fellow to be demonised isn’t a paki or an Indian but he is a Canadian so he becomes… yes here it comes….. an arab or a muslim

What makes you think mr/ms nomadic that he can’t be a white anglo-saxon or Quebecois French Canadian??

Listen folks for each mullah or ultraconservative muslim/arab there is a deranged quack out in the Western world who’d make the mullah look like Alice in Wonderland…. There are neo-cons and fundamentalists who believe doomsday is right around the corner – there are people who want to nuke anyone who doesn’t agree with their ideological leanings / dogma…

Time to give muslims and arabs a break … the world of Christianity (of which I am a part) has shown an utter lack of respect to women, minorities and people of other faiths, gagging scientists and declaring intelligent women to be witches…

We ought to lay off muslims and arabs – and stop being such bigots in these blogs. We come here and assume an air or superiority that just plain and simple SUCKS. Our own societies in the West are hardly utopian.

Joan of Arc

17 October, 2005 17:32  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hear ..hear...!!

I couldn't agree more with Joan of Arc !

Totally sick of the hypocrisy and double standards in the WASP sphere. The holier than thou attitude amongst some just sucks all the way to hell n back.

17 October, 2005 19:15  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Agree 100% with Joan of Arc. I lived in the UK and Europe for a long time and met a lot of genuine and down-to-earth people and I've developed a lot of respect for British and European societies.
It's really a disgrace to those societies that a lot of expats within 6 weeks of moving here seem to think they are the guardians of civilization and are somehow better than everyone else. White man's burden, anyone?

17 October, 2005 19:28  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Joan - Can't agree with you more. We westerners ought to take a deep breath and do some serious introspection. We are usually so self-righteous and pompous when we descend upon Eastern lands. The silly fella/lass at 17:15 for instance: "i have a pretty good idea, but i'll keep that to meself" . Oh gee, you're so damn smart aren't you.

17 October, 2005 19:46  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Joan bravo!! My husband knows a fellow white Scot (not a pak/indian/arab immigrant living in Scotland!!) who is having an affair with two filipinas while being married to another i.e. the third. The wife struggles to raise the kids, the other two are "switched" routinely when he flies back home from Dubai every two months. The two mistresses are a third of his age. I know a Canadian (extreeeemly white non Arab non Muslim!!!) who has wrecked three of his marriages by getting into adulterous relationships. For pete's sake this has nothing to do with being Muslim or not. Snap out of this supremo mode please. Ever wondered what non-Westerners think of us? We shove our parents in old people's homes and if not they'll often die unattended because we are too bleedin' busy preaching to the's our religion that has declared adultery a cardinal sin well before Islam came on the scene.If we're going to live in this part of the world we should shed some of this bloated ego because others don't think so highly of us as we would like to believe.

17 October, 2005 20:06  
Blogger Joe said...

This blog is a fascinating read.

I am half a world away, in the mountains of Montana, and this blog is a great window into a completely foreign world.

If any of you feel like going through the looking glass, check out my blog & photos. Yesterday, I was face-to-face with bison, rutting elk and a mountain lion...

17 October, 2005 21:31  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have read a few articles about these "illegal relationships" that sadly end with jailed lovers; never did I read any that mentioned Western culprits; the poor busted lovers were always Filipinos, Syrians, Pakistani... We are all equal in front of the law, but Westerners (Christians?) are they more equal than others? Do our citizenships carry a protecting value with the UAE authorities, thanks to the international weight and influence of our respective nation?

17 October, 2005 22:24  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Mrs Joan of Arc. My initial statement was neither for what he had done nor against it, it was just a statement. But for the record I am an arab and i am a muslim. The reason why I highlighted the idea that the Canadian could of been of the same origin as me, is because I would of reacted the same way he did. Just because SD and the rest of you believe that what the canadian did was wrong doesnt mean I concurred. Like I said before, I was only stating an idea.

Sorry to throw a spanner in your self righteous speech but sometimes people get so far left that they cannot see anything right.

17 October, 2005 22:26  
Blogger secretdubai said...

We are all equal in front of the law, but Westerners (Christians?) are they more equal than others? Do our citizenships carry a protecting value with the UAE authorities, thanks to the international weight and influence of our respective nation?

Yes and no. It is less serious for a Christian to be done for certain things (eg alcohol) but technically speaking, the penalties can still be applied for illicit sex. All sexual relations between two people who are not (1) of opposite gender and (2) legally married is illegal here.

But you can consider the drive to increase tourism, and the usual mores and couplings of western tourists, and you can draw your own conclusions as to a somewhat blind eye that may be being turned...

18 October, 2005 00:26  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nomaadic - it has nothing to do with being left or right. What could be more bigoted than this remark in a post above: "we never know how late an immigrant this particular gentleman was or what his origin is (i have a pretty good idea, but i'll keep that to meself)" 17 October, 2005 11:17. The point was that such behaviour doesn't have to be uniquely Arab/Muslim. Grasp the idea please.

Joan of Arc

18 October, 2005 05:18  
Blogger Tim Newman said...

In theory, equality before the law applies in the UAE, in practice it clearly does not. Being a Brit, I get away with more than other nationalities, largely because the UAE is attempting to attract large numbers of my countrymen to Dubai and part them from their cash.

As for those who say that Brits cannot talk about having affairs, for once I agree. The ability of the average middle-aged Brit to keep his **** in his pants when presented with an opportunity to do otherwise is woeful.

18 October, 2005 08:42  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sad, middle-aged Western men with much younger east-Asian wives aren't exactly a rarity in this part of the world. To see them trailing around the local shopping centers with a hang-dog look on their faces, realizing that the "submissive Oriental" of their fantasies turns out to be something much, much different in reality is really quite pathetic. Mr. Low-self-esteem Canadian, irrespective of his race or religion , is a despicable piece of scum who has ruined the lives of two young people by his pathetic insecurity.

18 October, 2005 09:35  
Blogger Tim Newman said...

Sad, middle-aged Western men with much younger east-Asian wives aren't exactly a rarity in this part of the world. To see them trailing around the local shopping centers with a hang-dog look on their faces, realizing that the "submissive Oriental" of their fantasies turns out to be something much, much different in reality is really quite pathetic.

Ain't it just? Each to their own, but it does not reflect well on Westerners. It is pathetic.

18 October, 2005 10:43  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I'm all for adulterers and fornicators but I think the action of the Canadian was reasonable enough. But I will not call the police, I will fire her ass for inviting a stranger in the house. And banging in the bathroom floor, in the masters bed, heck even in the kids room...Those horny little hamsters should have done in the middle of the desert.

18 October, 2005 14:37  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hahaha...good one anon...

18 October, 2005 14:59  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

tim newman - you're a very sensible fella


18 October, 2005 19:49  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

He could have been a paki or lebo (lebanese) canadian... of which there are plenty here.

18 October, 2005 21:51  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

this brings a valid point.
i am an american. how much can my embassy protect me against silly things?

18 October, 2005 21:53  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's all disgusting.....illegal sex, suspicious wife, bonking maid....then to add to it a load of blibs on pc's debating wether he is a 'true' Canadian or just a mere sub-continental with a lucky passport.
It is a fact that filipino maids are sex mad, and another fact that 'most' men wont refuse a 'tight' dip.....
his wife wasnt giving him enough and now she has seen how weak he is.....what a pity.
whats the next subject?

18 October, 2005 22:45  
Blogger secretdubai said...

It is a fact that filipino maids are sex mad

Oh dear oh dear oh dear :(

18 October, 2005 23:58  
Blogger black feline said...

hello SD...your cryptic comment..oh dear x3...r u implying u got a maid from hell recently b4 the revelation..or what? kindly enlighten us here..
anyway...i can only say this..filipinos in general are ROMANTIC's in their blood..and for this particular case, it was wrong of her to bring a stranger into the owner's house..a serious breach of trust.Up to his point, i dont think the owner has being found guilty..unless she filed a report for molestation or rape..

19 October, 2005 05:54  
Blogger secretdubai said...

No - my comment was more sarcastic, that someone should try to categorise an entire race/job of people as sex-mad. Which is rather different from being romantic!

I also don't find "illegal" sex "digusting" (unless we are talking about something involving animals or children, which is vile). A young man and woman is not "disgusting" to me - I couldn't care less if they're not married. Infidelity is perhaps disgusting, though if Mrs Canada starts up her own affair now - well, fair enough!

19 October, 2005 09:41  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

...and now secretdubai will hold forth on the meaning and implications of the "marriage relationship" and it's role in human and social ecperience...

(from the Western perspective, of course)

19 October, 2005 10:36  
Blogger secretdubai said...

Not at all! Just that I personally don't feel that sex outside marriage is necessarily immoral. It's my perspective, not necessarily a western one (well certainly not a western one if we look at Bush and his boys).

I'm not forcing this view on anyone else, it's just the one that I hold. If people want to believe that sex outside marriage is evil/immoral, that's totally up to them. I just don't share the view.

19 October, 2005 11:44  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Actually SD, when i said it was all disgusting, i was referring to the phrases used, like ILLEGAL sounds very criminal and sexgusting.
I am all for a bit of romance..plenty of love...smiling in the office after a night of is no-ones business unless you are hurting others.

19 October, 2005 12:49  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maids in general seem to be highly sexed in this sandpit. Even with spouses back home they are still feeling romantic all the time.
Thankfully my maid is a 40 yr old virgin (so she says) and sings like Celine Dion.......but I HAVE HAD the maids from hell and boy do they try to drag you there too....

19 October, 2005 12:55  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

All about a maid....

Seems to be a lot of reading between the lines here.

The report said that when she and her boyfriend were caught and prosecuted (as per UAE law), she then tried to drag the sponsor into it. The court studied her allegation and decided it had no validity. So who cares if he's from Canada, New Hebrides or Vanuatu. It simply ain't material.

Huh! What a waste of blography.

19 October, 2005 13:46  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i have finally broken thru to black feline's true identity...

a horny, filipina ...go gal go...

19 October, 2005 15:06  
Blogger black feline said...

ya sure im impressed...and i have also broken the da vinci code..u are the actual unholy grail from hell...go home...your surrogate nanny is waiting for u...milk time!

19 October, 2005 18:06  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Kudos to you're attracting folks from as far away as Montana..

and a big hello to you Joe from the Big Sky country!! ;)

20 October, 2005 17:07  
Blogger kingfisher said...

former Canadian Prime Minister, Pierre Trudeau stated:

"The State has no place in the bedrooms of the nation."

For once, I agree with a Liberal!

21 October, 2005 15:00  

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