Cloak of Darkness

Newspapers in the UAE frequently syndicate international features that have about as much relevance to residents as a pennyfarthing to a lobster. One such example is a Financial Times article on how women are "abandoning the one-coat fits all mentality":

"A straw poll of women yields the following information: most have between 12 and 20 coats in their wardrobe; most buy at least one new coat a season (this can mean four a year); most have clear-outs every five or 10 years to make room for new acquisitions."

A straw poll of inmates at Cell Block G reveals that just one single, lonely coat hangs in the wardrobe. Nor is it the the "short Dior alligator coat" or "long fur trimmed one by Andrew Gn" that the FT enthuses over.

It is instead a fifty-dirham anorak bought several years ago at Carrefour supermarket for a last minute trip to wintry northern Europe, that is used precisely once a year. This weekend it will again fulfil its annual role of comfort, warmth and economy on a trip to arctic London, where it will sneer with snug, smug nylon disdain at its costly, coatly cousins.