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26 November, 2005

A trove of flowery floridness

Just in case anyone was desperate to find somewhere to live in Dubai:

"A trove of luxury, opulence and style; Jumana Tower - Dubai Pearl is a picturesque dwelling for the crème de la crème, epitomising dreamy beaches with scintillating sun rendezvousing with the unsullied sands and the cool evening breeze beckoning sultry nights."

Prose doesn't get more unbearably purple than this.

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13 Comments:

Blogger nzm said...

It's hard to believe that anyone will want to live in the middle of the ring road that services the Jumeirah Palm.

All those car exhaust fumes carried on the cool evening breeze.

The beaches will be a dream alright - they'll only be able to see the private beaches belonging to the Royal Mirage and Sheikh Mohammed!

Preposterous purple prose!

26 November, 2005 07:21  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i like the "beckoning sultry nights."

26 November, 2005 07:48  
Blogger snow white said...

You have to feel so sorry for these brochure copywriters though - how many more times do we need to see the words prestigious and unique (though it's usually 'almost unique or very unique' in a travesty of the English language)?

Unsullied sands up by Dubai Media City? No. Dreamy beaches? Nightmare more like. Cool evening breeze? For 6 weeks a year. Picturesque dwelling? Not unless it's turned into a farmhouse in the leafy Cotswolds overnight.

26 November, 2005 09:24  
Blogger शक्ती said...

rendezvousing - is that even a word?

26 November, 2005 09:30  
Blogger samuraisam said...

rendezvousing

it would seem so

26 November, 2005 12:24  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ren·dez·voused, (-vd)ren·dez·vous·ing, (-vng) ren·dez·vous (-vz)

To bring or come together at a rendezvous.

26 November, 2005 12:51  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

the ad sounds like flowery floridness

To the people in the know though, its more like 'putrid fakeness'

hype, hype.... and you know what else.. oh yes.. HYPE !

26 November, 2005 14:43  
Blogger _sublime_ said...

Gee, I actually am quite desperate to find somewhere nice and cheap to live in Dubai...the opening line got me all excited then that second paragraph promptly knocked me back down to earth like a sack of potatoes falling off a truck.

Oh well the cycle is de rigeur these days :)

26 November, 2005 16:40  
Blogger nonpretender said...

Dont you just love the irony. The Dubai Pearl, a haven of tranquility.. sandwiched inbetween a motorway 5 lanes wide leading to the Palm Jumeirah, a colony of 100000 people who hoot and toot their horns past your apartment on their way to karama-on-the-sea...

Pure bliss I tell you. Nicely done. Fake.

26 November, 2005 16:42  
Blogger _sublime_ said...

A prime example of how the property copyrighters operate is the landmark properties site...they try endlessly to come up with a unique descriptions for each of dozens of absolutely identical properties in their database (take International City for example) but it comes across as so half assed after the first few.

A solution to ease the misery of these poor copyrighters would be to come up with a software applicaiton which could automatically generate copy form a database of Dubai buzzwords.

Or maybe this is already being done? I probably wouldn't notice the difference.

26 November, 2005 16:47  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmmm...doesn't this bear a striking similarity to the Dubai Police website posted by SD earlier?

Either we are heading for a nauseous literary revolution in Dubai or Dubai Police has found a new avocation while they are not protecting us from the rapists in the labour camps...

26 November, 2005 17:31  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

when it comes to interesting prose i don't think it gets any better than khaleej times

26 November, 2005 20:34  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

SD: i am glad to see that your attention has turned to the real estate ad copies around Dubai. I always thought that how can every project be unique, luxurious, and ground breaking - but then if appealing to the average lebo it does work.
Please continue to rip up and expose the faults of real estate marketing here.

03 December, 2005 12:41  

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