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10 May, 2007

Todger bodger

When a long schlong goes wrong:

Dubai: A newly married man, who went for a penis enlargement procedure, is suing a private clinic for Dh3 million because he suffers from erectile dysfunction following the operation, his lawsuit said.

The man said he visited the clinic for "penis enlargement and sexual performance enhancement".

Following the surgery, he found he suffered from permanent erectile dysfunction.


All the harder (or rather softer) for this guy that marital aids are banned in the UAE. Given soaring diabetes rates and the significant percentage of men that must suffer from diabetes-related impotence, one would think that vibrators and dildos would be handed out free on the health service.

Particularly as Islam carries a requirement for husbands to sexually satisfy their wives.

Labels:

22 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Particularly as Islam carries a requirement for husbands to sexually satisfy their wives.

This would have been a better bet :)

10 May, 2007 08:36  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Someone send this guy a penis pump

10 May, 2007 10:39  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh dear, now i've gone and drawn the conclusion that all Arabs have very small sexual organs. The article doesn't even mention the guy's nationality but I find it convienient to draw conclusions! Never mind.

10 May, 2007 11:17  
Blogger C said...

the sexual muscle is between the ears.

10 May, 2007 15:03  
Anonymous fellow atheist said...

That's really scary. I wouldn't have anyone operate on my penis. Not sure how that guy was even able to consider it. The risks far outweigh the benefits -- and I don't care how small he was.

Then again, if I were to have such an operation, I would not care for the size (I'm quite happy with mine), but I would have my penis vibrate -- cause, you know, there is no way in hell a man can match a vibrator! While I would allow dildos, I completely back a ban on vibrators ;)

10 May, 2007 15:06  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmmm SD,

I believe this is not the first time you have mentioned vibrators and dildo's Secret Dubai.

Are you missing some home comforts. What's up, cant the husband raise the flag, or do you require alot of jump starting.

I think its just a shame that even though Dubai is sort of a third world country, it isnt in some ways.

Well you see in a normal third world country, a middle aged western / moneyed woman will have no need for a vibrator, or a dildo.

Young bucks will be queing to service you. I promise, no kidding.
They will be calling you their queen, princess, and all that fancy stuff.

And when they do you, and they look into your eyes, you know they will be doing you for real. Not like the usual bread and butter middle aged dude with his flaccid equipment who you know is thinking of an eighteen year old thai bird.

Oh well SD, whats to do. Life is cruel sometimes.

10 May, 2007 21:13  
Blogger Sex and Dubai said...

That's why our motto is : try before you buy.

11 May, 2007 01:18  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anonymous @ 21:13

You've got issues, son.

11 May, 2007 01:32  
Blogger Subcontinental Cat said...

wow thats reely funny LOL

11 May, 2007 02:36  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

When I saw this news in GN, I knew SD was definitely gonna pick this.

11 May, 2007 19:24  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

His wife must be finding this a bit hard to swallow...

Cue Sid James laugh....

11 May, 2007 21:32  
Blogger Emirati said...

No offense everyone, but making fun, and turning into a joke a man's incapability to reproduce properly and the accident in surgery is utterly disgusting and hovering at a very low level of personal ethics.

Tell me, how many of you would make fun of a woman who was barren and incapable of producing children ?

Still yet, how many of you would be able to say these things that you say on the internet, to this man's face ?

pathetic.

12 May, 2007 21:43  
Blogger BuJ said...

I agree 100% with Emirati. A poor guy's suffering has turned into a sick joke.

Plus, SD, as much as I enjoy reading your satirical posts, I disagree with your last line about Islam. This guy's decision to go for this operation probaby has nothing to do with Islam. Thus it's unfair to make your own assumptions.

13 May, 2007 01:41  
Blogger secretdubai said...

This guy's decision to go for this operation probaby has nothing to do with Islam. Thus it's unfair to make your own assumptions.

I quite agree - but I never made that assumption.

My point is that now this man does probably require a marital aid, he shouldn't be denied one, especially since marital satisfaction is emphasised in Islam.

13 May, 2007 01:54  
Blogger DubaiSalsa said...

wouldnt the woman be satisfied by dancing salsa .. if the sexual satisfaction is not obtained ... hehe, i think she would enjoy it more than sex.

14 May, 2007 01:44  
Blogger DubaiSalsa said...

Anonymous @ 11:17

well,if the article doesnt even mention the nationality.. that would lead to another conclusion... that you have been thinking about the size of the Arabs' sexual organ for quite a long time .... heh

14 May, 2007 01:48  
Anonymous fellow atheist said...

emirati,

While this is a tragic story, I still find it funny. Only an insecure man would undergo a surgery to 'enlarge his penis' and enhance his 'sexual performance' (assuming it would be as a result of a larger penis). As such, ridicule is warranted.

I've had a friend who had a smaller penis -- we would make fun of each other (him having a girlfriend at the time and me without one), etc. He never felt the need to 'enlarge his penis'.

Perhaps such individuals need proper psychological therapy before undergoing such an operation to begin with.

To be honest, I find the whole thing to be pathetic -- but not the ridicule of the fool.

There.

14 May, 2007 06:59  
Blogger S. said...

A friend of mine who recently moved to Dubai had her dildo confiscated at the airport. I'm amazed it showed on the airport screener in the first place, but having it unceremoniously waved in front of the customs officials in their room wasnt fun at all.

Are they somehow illegal in Dubai..? BTW, this is not something that happened to a friend of a friend. I heard it from the person who had it happen to them.

Perhaps it is now on someones trophy wall..?

14 May, 2007 12:45  
Blogger DubaiSalsa said...

Hey S.... Hell no, they are not prohibited here,,, cant you see the country full of Porn stuff ? heh

14 May, 2007 20:57  
Anonymous Tel-Avivi said...

Hi guys, Shalom & Salamu Alaykum from Tel-Aviv

Gr8 blog you have there with interesting posts indeed.

This story reminds me of a local Israeli juicy tale:

In a medical event/forum, a male Doctor wooed a female Doctor & at the end of the day they found themselves spending the night in one bed at the convention's hotel.

In the morning, the female Dr' had her shower & as she came out, the male Dr' said: "look, I don't know you & I don't even know your name, but I can surely guess you are a surgeon Dr'.

She was amazed & asked him how did he learn that? The male Dr' said he saw her going out from the shower with her arms up as if she washed herself prior to an operation/ surgery…

The female Dr' smiled & said she can as well guess which Dr' her "one night stand" is. Of course, he was curious to hear her…

She said she's sure her partner is an anesthetist…
"Wow", the man was eager to know how she knew that.

"Well, while you did what you did yesterday evening, I didn't feel anything…."

Have a nice evening

Tel-Avivi

19 May, 2007 20:59  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Are vibrators truly banned in the UAE? So if I am travelling there, I can't bring one?

17 June, 2008 07:28  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

emeratis will be taking it

21 September, 2010 18:02  

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