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17 September, 2006

Model behaviour

Lola LebCan is out and proud. After weeks of mysteriously sneaking around the office at lunchtime and declining dinner invitations, she finally reveals her secret: an exclusive, executive diet service. Thrice a day, exact calorie-counted, size-controlled portions of Cristal and caviar have been arriving at her door in little bento boxes.

"It's perfect, it takes far too long to count out all those tiny eggs yourself," she points out.

As she stands to leave, in all her bikini-clad-Ursula-Andress-ocean-emerging glory, we cast a rather guilty eye over our cheesecake, forks hovering in mid air. But PR queens have different standards to the rest of us. They must dazzle in style and beauty and glamour, or they fail utterly.

Whereas our role is to preserve the sacred traditions of the sandlands, which means endless unlimited buffets, brunches, and putting on plenty of "Dubai padding". The good news is that we will be curvaceous enough to model in Madrid, whereas Lola will hopefully snap in two.

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7 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

She sounds very Lesbianese (as I call them) - everything just so, but done by someone else. Stay happy with the Lime Tree carrot cake and who care about an extra kilo here and there I say!

17 September, 2006 20:41  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Define Irony:

A bunch of muslims burning some churches to protest the pope's statement linking islam to violence.

If anything, a big thank you to the pope for that Q.E.D

- DD

17 September, 2006 22:05  
Blogger flic said...

This is refreshing.

17 September, 2006 23:04  
Anonymous Wo-hey!! said...

Always fancied a bit 'o meat on me girls. tuck in SD.

18 September, 2006 01:07  
Blogger Moona said...

"I understand they want to set this tone of healthy beautiful women but what about discrimination against the model and what about the freedom of the designer?"
0_o discriminations are far different in this world

18 September, 2006 09:15  
Anonymous SumDumGui said...

more cushion for the pushin... oh and by the way... our beloved ISP has banned hi5 too.. we are not allowed to have anymore friends ..... i guess ill have to go buy a fatwa from india

18 September, 2006 15:54  
Blogger Insipid Chagrin said...

And how does one define inanity?

Sticking the pope into a thread concerned with Lebcan dietary habits.

Yet another case of quod erat demonstrandum, DD.

Though - i didn't quite know what to think of the mess. The pope might have been more judicious- I read his lecture and it would have been perfectly complete without that gratuitous quote.

But... there needs to be less overwhelmed protest and more reasoned argument. Just where are all those Islamic scholars that need to step up and deconstruct the pope's lecture, offering rebuttals?

It is facetious when you shoot someone in protest against having been accused of shooting someone. But i think that more and more, people this side of the world are becoming convinced that the "West" has it in for them. And frankly, the same "West" has done little to allay those fears.

19 September, 2006 11:17  

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