The concrete curtain

A few years ago an associate was commissioned to copywrite a brochure for a new real estate development. All the material was sent through, which details such as location, type of building, market segment, main features and so forth. The associate quickly spotted what seemed to be a mistake, and called the agency. "It says forty towers in the information. Did you mean four?"

"No, it's forty towers."

"On that one strip of land? Will they fit?"

"They'll have to fit."

Roll forward to 2007, and the huge lumbering concrete monstrosity that is Jumeirah Beach Residence has indeed been crammed into the strip of land between Dubai Marina and Jebel Ali power station. So little thought was given to proper planning that no room was left to put in adequate roads, let alone parking:

[Head of Roads Planning Section Hashim Mohammed] Al Hashmi revealed that a high quality public transport bus service would be introduced for the residents of Dubai Marina and Jumeirah Beach Residence. "The corridor in this area is too narrow and since the buildings have come up little can be done about it."

Drive around Jumeirah Beach Residence at any time of the day and it is shocking how dark and shadowy the narrow roads are, in a city usually so brilliantly sunlit as Dubai. The towers cut off the sea, the sky and the sunset like a huge concrete curtain. As National Geographic put it:

"Some critics are questioning the speed of change and a lack of planning: The towering apartment complexes stand like a wall, cutting off the rest of Dubai from its coast."

So who's going to live there? There may be millions more workers pouring into the UAE, but how many of them - even white collars - can afford to rent at JBR, let alone buy? Two years ago, analyst Matein Khalid gave these predictions:

"But in 2007-2008, a phenomenal 200,000 new units will hit the market. This means that we need about 800,000 new expats who are not labourers, housemaids, tailors, minimum wage bachelors or the Sharjah/Ajman commuters to fill this unit. In essence, a doubling of the professional high income salaried population of Dubai in the next two years. Realistic? Not at all."

And now a report from investment bank EFG Hermes is in the spotlight, with analysts noting "overbuilding on a heroic scale":

"The report suggested Dubai has a demand for 40,000 to 50,000 residential units per annum. But it failed to make the point observers have added since that only 30 per cent of this demand is in the luxury sector which comprises the majority of construction projects.

"This could leave the real level of annual demand for new high-end properties in Dubai at 15,000 units per annum, which was also suggested by figures forecast in a recent report on the population growth outlook until 2010 from the Dubai Chamber of Commerce and Industry."

Jumeirah Beach Residence: on course to be the world's darkest, emptiest, luxury skyscrapers.

Steamy windows

Driving past the alarmingly concrete-gold-fish-bowl-esque suburb that Jumeirah Beach Residence is rapidly evolving into, one wonders if residents will be forced to adopt sheikhmobile-style tinted glass to preserve their privacy?

Otherwise every evening, the view (for those that couldn't afford "ocean views") will be of a thousand domestic soap operas taking place about ten feet from ones window. As if the Young & the Restless and Bold & the Beautiful weren't tedious enough, endless "screens" of MiddleEastEnders and Helldorado will be playing out nightly.

Or perhaps they might consider Bahrain's cunning plan, and force landlords to install one-way windows preventing residents from looking out?